It’s been fascinating talking to friends and strangers about my situation and hearing what they think about it. It’s perhaps not surprising that every woman I have spoken to has been very supportive of the decision Anna and I have taken.
What has genuinely surprised me, however, has been the reaction of the men. I’ve not heard a single negative comment or been made the butt of a single joke, quite the reverse in fact. All the men I’ve spoken to have totally understood and some have even expressed an interest in following in my footsteps.
That said, one of the most supportive men I spoke to also admitted he could never become the primary carer for his own children. He agreed the course of action Anna and I are taking makes absolute sense for us, especially economically, but confided that if he became his children’s full-time carer they would drive him to distraction and he would “kill them”! In a bizarre way I actually admire him for his honesty, children are without doubt very hard work.
For the record, he was joking about killing his children. Please don’t call Social Services, it would result in an unnecessary and ugly scene, but back to the matter in hand.
I’ve come to the conclusion that the world is obviously more advanced and liberal than I gave it credit for. There might not be many men in my situation, but we aren’t considered social pariahs at all.
I think the real test, however, will come in a couple of weeks when the transition actually takes place and Helen’s nursery hours are cut (oh yes, it’s all been formally agreed). Will the stay at home mothers accept me? Will I get invited to their coffee mornings and the like? I think their response will be fascinating.
Truth be told, if I get invited to some kind of mothers’ coffee morning I think I’ll run a mile in the opposite direction!
No comments:
Post a Comment